Returning the Scud Serve
by postages
Summary: [Jiroh x Atobe]The Scud Serve is hard to return. But trying to do so won't hurt you.


Author's Notes: Scud Serve. Can See the Light. Atobe and Jiroh. Make the connection.

This is my first Jiroh x Atobe, and I am proud of it.

Disclaimers: TeniPuri doesn't belong to me. It belongs to Takeshi Konomi-sama.

**Returning the Scud Serve**

By Hanabi Reeza

The Scud Serve is very fast. You wouldn't even see it coming, but you would feel it. You make no effort to move, or even have the intention to at least try to return the fast service. And it just passes you without you even realizing it. It had already been stopped by the hard ground, but you still feel its presence. And then realization dawns upon you. Could you have returned it if you have moved, or even had the tiniest intention of returning it?

The same applies to love.

There was a time when I was madly in love with Tezuka Kunimitsu, Seishun Gakuen Tennis Team's Buchou. My admiration for him lasted for two years. I had practically been obsessed with him for a year. The next thing I knew, I had already fallen in love with him.

But I didn't want to accept that fact. Loving someone meant lowering yourself and giving everything to that special someone. My pride kicked in. I could never lower myself for another human. I am Atobe Keigo. And besides, it would look strange if a man loved another one of his kind.

But that statement proved me wrong.

Shishido was more than happy to announce to the whole team that he was in love with Ohtori. What startled me more was when he told everyone they were together.

Guess I was wrong about homosexual relationships.

They looked so right for each other.

So I decided to let the emotions flow, fully accepting that I have indeed fallen for the stoic captain. I have never been happier in my 14 years of existence. My interaction with the other regulars seemed to have improved, and even my tennis skills did. All in all, it was a great life.

And then I suddenly felt something. It felt like a sudden gush of coldness. My perfect world crumbled in front of me as my heart shattered into smithereens. I lost all hope to carry on with my life, and everything just seemed to be so wrong.

I was on my way home, my chauffeur driving my purple convertible. We passed by the park. I saw two people who seemed awfully familiar. I finally recognized them.

A smile suddenly graced my lips. It was Tezuka.

"Matte. Stop the car." I stood and got out of the car, as quickly yet as gracefully as possible.

I could see him. There, standing near the lake, was Tezuka, the one who had my heart, the one I love. He looked so handsome. The afternoon sun setting, colors passionately painting the sky. And the Sakura petals were slowly descending. It was a perfect subject for an artist to paint.

Ah. So perfect.

Wait. I'm walking towards him, but what would I say? I couldn't simply walk up to him and ask him if he found the scenery picturesque. That would be…lame. Okay. What will I say? I closed my eyes. What will I say? Think, Keigo! Think!

I could say…

"I love you."

Of course I could say that.

Wait. That was not my voice. That would be…

I opened my eyes.

I felt my world crumble as the events in front of me unfolded slowly.

Tezuka, my Tezuka, was kissing Fuji Syusuke passionately, the way I've always dreamed that would be happening to me.

Suddenly, summer had never felt so cold.

The day after, the practice went by without me even noticing that it was finished. I don't think I played because, for the first time in my entire life as a tennis player, I didn't want to pick up my racket. Before I knew it, everyone had already left.

I stayed behind. I just wanted some time alone.

I stayed in one of the corners of the locker room, trying to hide in the shadows. For the first time in my life, I lowered my head, only to find a pair of feet. I knew they didn't belong to me. Curious, I lifted my head and found a pair of confused eyes.

"Ara? You're still here? I thought everyone left already…"

It was Jiroh.

"Why are you still here?" Jiroh snickered. "Normally. You would be in Seishun Gakuen, admiring how great Tezuka-kun is, na?"

Tezuka…

Images flashed in my head. Tezuka standing near the lake, Tezuka kissing Fuji, Fuji kissing Tezuka, both of them looking so happy.

I just stood there and was unable to say anything, but I found myself producing teardrops. One by one, they slid down my eyes.

"Wha- Why? Oh my… Atobe, don't cry! Please!" Jiroh looked scared, but the tears just kept flowing. I couldn't stop it.

An Atobe isn't supposed to cry.

But the emotions were just too strong.

The next thing I knew, his arms had already enveloped me.

I felt myself stiffen for a few seconds, but I eventually gave in. There was this warmth, the reassuring feeling that told me to release everything. It was as if he felt my despair and anguish, and he need not ask me why I broke down anymore. I knew then that it was unlike me, but I just couldn't hold back the emotions any longer. I could not wear the mask anymore.

It was something new, the warmth that he had. It wasn't the same that my admirers radiated.

And from then on, I knew that my life would be different. The next day, I never felt better.

We kept that moment only to ourselves, Jiroh and I. No one else knew about my breakdown.

Now that I think about it, I find it amazing, as I have not yet cried ten years prior to that event.

And so I went on with my life. I still loved Tezuka, though. I didn't care if he loved someone else. There were times that I would remember that incident, and I couldn't help crying over it again. And everytime that happened, Jiroh would be there. Even one time when I felt so down, when I felt nobody truly loved me.

I couldn't take off my mask when the others were around, knowing that my reputation would be ruined.

But whenever I was with Jiroh, I could cry. I could do anything that I couldn't do when others were around. He would make things better. He would make me smile. Everything would be alright. I didn't need to be Don Atobe, or oresama. I could just be me, no masks, no pretenses. It's like being freed from a cage after a long time of being imprisoned.

It was a nice feeling. It was as if I had been reborn, and the life that had been granted to me was so much better than before.

After some time, I was back to my normal self, the Great Atobe Keigo. My skills have greatly increased. And Jiroh was more than happy to see that I was fine again.

Again, Jiroh was there for me as he had always been. He who had loved me for the longest time. And I couldn't help but smile whenever I think of him.

"Don't think like that. There is someone who truly loves you." Jiroh countered, his voice suddenly serious.

"And that would be?"

"Me."

Yes. I knew of Jiroh's feelings. I felt them. It was overwhelming, the deluge of the unnoticed emotions. I would hear him talk to himself sometimes. He would ask himself why I couldn't bring myself to love him, why I couldn't even see his heart that he had offered a long time ago to me. And he would eventually break down and cry.

I felt it. But I made no effort to move, or try to return his feelings.

And I only realized it now, that I could have, but I didn't.

Could it be I'm falling in love, that I have finally let go of my feelings for Tezuka?

But, I thought, it was too late. Jiroh had already been hurt so much.

If only I had given more importance to him, to those gentle smiles, those reassuring pats, then there would be no need for tears. He would not have suffered anymore. And everything would end happily.

But no. I was too preoccupied with Tezuka. I only cared for myself. I didn't think about others., if I would hurt them, cause them pain, or just make them feel plain stupid.

I'm so cruel.

"Warui Atobe." 

I was suddenly brought back to reality by a familiar voice.

"You weren't listening to me. Bad, bad Atobe."

It was Jiroh.

"Aa. Suman. I was thinking of something."

"More important than me?" he said jokingly, but I heard the feeling of hurt in his tone.

"Well… What would you say if I said yes?"

"Wah!" He started flailing. I could only laugh. After a few moments, he stopped.

"Are you serious about that, about what you said?" His voice was serious. I looked up to meet his eyes and smiled gently.

"Iya. You're the most important to me." I looked around and saw that we were the only ones left and gave him a hug. It was a moment for us. Time seemed to have stopped for that fleeting moment.

"Do you know how much I love you, Atobe?"

He asked me that question before. I wasn't able to answer. But now, I think I could.

"I always have."

For the first time, he smiled genuinely. And I could only smile back at him.

The Scud Serve is very fast. You wouldn't even see it coming, but you would feel it. You make no effort to move, or even have the intention to at least try and return the fast service. And it just passes you without you even realizing it. It had already been stopped by the hard ground, but you could still feel its presence. And then realization dawns upon you. Could you have returned it if you had moved, or even had the tiniest intention of returning it?

Yes. You could have. But regretting wouldn't do you any good.

Your opponent serves again, still using the Scud Serve. You are now prepared to return it, giving all that you have into that shot that will make you win.

And you did.

It was a return ace.

The crowd cheered wildly.

"Game and match won by Atobe, seven games to six!"

03 June 04

8:59p


End file.
